Have you ever needed to start over? Leave something you've been doing in order to do something better. . . .
This has been on my mind because I'm learning to draw and have had to start over after spending all day drawing and painting a picture, only to discover it was all wrong--the colors, the proportion--something wasn't right. I found myself resisting starting over so much so that I spent another day trying to fix the painting. In the end I had to scrap it and start over anyway. I found myself wondering why I resisted starting over in the first place. This made me wonder if there were other things I was resisting doing and was wasting my time just trying to fix.
So when I read an article about "do-overs" I decided I would write a post about it and went in search of a song on YouTube to go along with what I planned to write. Instead, I found Andy Stanley's 4-part series on the subject of starting over.
He says there are three myths surrounding starting over:
- Experience makes you better
- Now that I know better I'll do better
- Time is against me
Firstly, he explains that only experience that has been evaluated can make things better. Secondly, you won't do better just because you know better unless you have a plan. And thirdly, time is your friend. Andy points out that a person in pain can't help but be self-absorbed and a self-absorbed person won't have the clarity necessary to make a better decision next time--so give yourself time to heal and then you'll be in a better position to see what you need to do instead of what you've always done in the past.
In these four videos Andy tells us how to ensure that next time won't be like the last time--whether it concerns a failed relationship, a lost job or anything that requires you to start over. I've posted the first video below. The other three are links to watch it on You Tube. If my introduction hasn't enticed you to watch the whole series, I hope you will at least watch Part 4 because it may very well motivate you to watch all the videos.
If you prefer, you can watch the series on their website. While you're there you can find other series (under Episodes) to help you make better decisions so that you'll have fewer regrets.
Part 2 introduces the three steps to succeed next time:
- Own it
- Rethink it
- Release it
He addresses Step 1 on this video. He uses the story of Adam and Eve to help us understand that we are part of our problems.
Part 3 addresses Step 2 and shows us why we need to renew our thinking and why it is so important to take off the old before putting on the new--just like when refinishing furniture. If we don't, the new thinking won't "stick."
Part 4 addresses Step 3 and says that not forgiving people who have hurt you is like smuggling them into your future. You are giving them a foothold in your life from which to continue to hurt you.
Father, thank you for bringing to the surface my resistance to having to "start over" and then leading me to the tools that I need to succeed.
Link to scripture: Romans 8:28